How To Keep Your Dog From Ruining Your Sex Life

You finish your third glass of wine and flash your date those bedroom eyes. Things heat up so you move towards the bedroom, completely in the moment…and then your dog starts whining on the bed.

Whether it’s with a room clearing fart, crying and pawing at a closed bedroom door, or jumping up on the bed during the act, dogs have a unique talent for making sexy time anything but.

Feel like your dog has been ruining the mood? Here are some common behavioral issues that can kill that sexual vibe and how to fix them.

1. Your dog feels like he has the right to “play” with you and your boo

Photo Credit: Getty Images

Photo Credit: Getty Images

“Hey! That looks fun! Mind if I hop on and awkwardly lick your foot?”

That’s probably not what you had in mind by “trying something new.” Many dogs will feel they have a right to be on your bed, especially if they sleep in it with you. If your dog sleeps in your bed, he sees it as HIS bed. When he sees you and a partner playing on it, he thinks he has every right to join in.

To curb this behavior, start training your pup to get off your bed when told. Give your dog their own space – preferably their own dog bed in a separate room – and reward them for going there when told. If they hop up when things are getting hot and heavy, tell them to go to their safe spot and shut the door.

2. Your dog cries if she is not allowed to be in the same room as you

Photo Credit: Getty Images

Photo Credit: Getty Images

Every dog owner has tried the simple solution of shutting the dog out of the room. For some, this works. For most, it induces a mood killing soundtrack of whines, howls, and banging scratches on the door.

If your dog suffers from separation anxiety, consider crate training her. Crate training is a great way to get your dog comfortable with being alone. Crate training takes a lot of patience and can be rough. It’s hard to hear your dog crying locked in a kennel in the other room. If your dog is crying, try to stay in the moment. It’s what is best for ALL of you. Crank up some music to help keep you focused on what is going on in the bedroom, not outside of it.

3. Your partner pays more attention to the dog than you

Photo Credit: Getty Images

Photo Credit: Getty Images

Your partner and your dog having a stellar rapport? Fabulous. Your boo being more interested in playing with your dog than snuggling with you? Not so much. If you feel like a dog, whether yours or theirs, is getting in the way of your sex life, communicate that to your partner. It may be an awkward conversation, but a necessary one. Agree to have designated “alone time” where the dog is in a separate room, in their crate, or out with a dog walker so you truly are spending time alone. And as fun as it is to take your pup along on outdoor dates, set dates specifically where they stay home.

4.  Your dog hates your partner

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Photo Credit: Getty Images

Some dogs take time to warm up to a partner. It’s hard for those dogs to get used to the idea of you giving your attention to someone other than them, and they may retaliate with inappropriate chewing, excessive barking, growling, or even biting. If your dog genuinely seems to hate your partner, it’s time to dedicate serious time to training, or bringing in a professional to break your dog’s territorial, destructive habits. A trainer can help your dog learn that you do not need to be “protected” and that your partner is someone they can trust and get along with. It may be expensive, but if your partner is someone you anticipate will be in your life for a long time, it is worth it.

5. Your dog gives you and your partner the most judgmental look

Photo Credit: Getty Images

Photo Credit: Getty Images

Nothing ruins post-coital bliss like the hurt and confused face nearly every dog seems to have after witnessing their human do the dirty deed. Instead of succumbing to guilt, remind yourself that you are a human being with needs. What you are doing is healthy and normal, and your dog has absolutely no idea what transpired. To avoid this situation completely, keep your dog out of your room during intimate times and reward them with treats for behaving while you were gone.

Has your dog ever put a damper on your sex life? What was the behavior and what did you do to stop it? Let us know in the comments.