Day in the life of a dangerously dirty dog

Muddy Paws: Yikes!

Mom brought the home most fascinating little creature the other day. She calls him Yikes! Compact Deep CleanerÔ – and he eats absolutely everything. And when I say everything, I mean he doesn’t leave a single drip or drop for the rest of us.

For example, this morning Dad knocked over the grape juice. Before I’d had time to even take in the aroma, Yikes!Ô was on it. Literally on the rug underneath the kitchen table. His little mouth sucked up every last particle – including the coffee stain from months ago. It’s like the spill never happened. Eerie. I can’t even smell the stuff anymore.

The really weird thing is, it’s not just juice and coffee he devours. Those muddy, stinky paw prints I left on the living room carpet yesterday? Gone. Mom used Yikes!Ô to remove ’em. I got a little scared when he foamed at the mouth, but Mom just clapped her hands and said, “The spray and suction functions work beautifully!”

And it’s not that I’m jealous, but I think Mom’s taking him on special trips. I overheard her on the phone talking about how terrific Yikes!Ô is in the car. A “dream on the upholstery,” apparently. Little does he know, I left my mark there in the seat crevice – right where Mom positioned that crazy long nose of his.

Don’t get me wrong – I respect the guy. He stays away from my kibble and leaves my rawhides alone. And frankly, ever since he’s been around, Mom doesn’t seem as uptight as she used to be… Hey Mom – what’s that on your shoe? Yikes!Ô