funny dog quotes
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Funny Dog Quotes Only Dog Owners Will Understand

woman holding smiling dog funny dog quotes
(Photo credit: Nastasic / Getty Images)

Dog ownership is a hilarious journey full of unexpected twists and turns that only other dog owners can truly appreciate. From our pups’ strange habits to the endless amounts of fur, dogs have a way of making us laugh while keeping us on our toes. Because there’s a strong comical side to being a dog owner, we’ve gathered a long list of funny dog quotes that will have you LOLing.

Whether you’re dealing with a mischievous pup and need some perspective or are simply jonesing for a hearty laugh, these quotes are sure to resonate with all dog owners who understand the humor and absurdity of life with a furry companion. So cuddle up with your fur baby and indulge in these funny dog quotes that only dog owners will truly understand.

Funny dog quotes

“Everyone thinks they have the best dog, and none of them are wrong.”

“Whoever said that diamonds are a girl’s best friend never had a dog.”

“Handle every situation like a dog. If you can’t eat it or play with it, just pee on it and walk away.”

“I don’t who care who dies in the movie, as long as the dog lives.”

“If your dog doesn’t have at least five nicknames, are you even a dog owner?”

“Be the person your dog thinks you are.”

“The only thing better than a dog is two dogs.”

“Life isn’t perfect, but my dog is.”

“If being a crazy dog owner is wrong, then I don’t want to be right.”

“I am one dog short of crazy.”

“The best therapists have fur and four legs.”

“Career goal: Stay-at-home dog owner.”

“If I trust you with my dog, I trust you with my life.”

“Not to brag or anything, but I’m kind of a big deal to my dog.”

“I don’t follow the rules. I follow dogs on Instagram.”

“Whoever said you can’t buy happiness forgot about puppies.”

“Nothing in the world is friendlier than a wet dog.”

“Dogs are like potato chips. You can’t have just one.”

“You can’t tell me what to do. You’re not my dog.”

“I work hard so my dog can have a better life.”

Funny quotes about life with dogs

“Life without a dog is like an unsharpened pencil. It has no point.”

“This home is filled with love and dog hair.”

“If you want the best seat in the house, you’ll have to move the dog.”

“Every snack you make, every meal you bake, every bite you take… I’ll be watching you.”

“She believed she could, but her dog was asleep on her lap, so she didn’t.”

“People think I’m crazy because I talk to my dogs. What am I supposed to do? Just ignore them when they ask me a question?”

“Dog walking is my cardio.”

“You know you’re a dog owner when you can’t go to the bathroom without an escort.”

“You can trust your dog to guard your house but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich.”

Cute quotes about puppy love

“If the kindest souls were rewarded with the longest lives, dogs would outlive us all.”

“You can get true love from some humans and all dogs.”

“Girls just wanna have dogs.”

“I just want to stay home and hang out with my dog.”

“My true love has four paws.”

“Some people don’t understand the love I have for my dog. That’s okay. My dog does.”

“As a matter of fact, the world does revolve around my dog.”

“Relationship status: dog owner.”

“I care deeply about five people and, like, 500 dogs on Instagram I’ve never met.”

Hilarious quotes about why canines companions are better than people

“If you’re uncomfortable around my dog, I’m happy to lock you in the other room when you come over.”

“If our dog doesn’t like you, we probably won’t either.”

“Choosing a dog may be the only chance you get to pick a relative.”

“Leave me alone – I’m only speaking to dogs today.”

“What I like most about people is their dogs.”

“I’m suspicious of people who don’t like dogs, but I trust a dog when it doesn’t like a person.”

“The more I know men, the better I like dogs.”

“You know what I like about people? Their dogs.”

Funny quotes about dog poop

“If aliens saw us walking our dogs and picking up their poop, who would they think is in charge?”

“My kid poops in public.”

“No, seriously. I’m late because my dog wouldn’t poop.”

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